How to find a therapist by a therapist

Divorce is particularly painful for most people around Thanksgiving and Christmas. Most of us have at least a few happy memories about past holidays and these are reminders of what we have lost. These positive memories can make you doubt your decision to divorce and ignite that little voice inside that says, “maybe I could have tried x,y,z and it all would have worked out.” If you are a people pleaser, this continuous examination of your part of the past equation may make you weary and feel a little crazy.

The average first marriage that ends in divorce lasts about 8 years, about the average life of a new car. Divorce rates in the US are at nearly 50 percent for first marriages, and two thirds of them are initiated by women. With such dismal facts, it seems important to understand why marriages succeed or fail and how to know when it’s time to separate.

I married my first date. My second first date was at 47, after my decades long marriage ended abruptly.

Dating in your 40s after divorce is not for the faint of heart. I figured a few things out along the way that might be helpful.

Three tips for dating after divorce in midlife

If your marriage was rocky prior to COVID-19 you are likely struggling to survive the conflict, with loneliness that comes from living with someone you do not connect with, while worrying that this will never end. This generation has never had a situation this global and yet this restrictive. Spending 24hours a day together is stressful for a healthy relationship, but if you add job insecurity, health worries, caretaking when someone is ill, and little change of scenery for activities or other influences, it can be the death of a marriage.